Last impression

Most people are unaware of how they come across to others. Sometimes it is because they are sheltered. They expect everyone to like them, because people always have. Sometimes it is because of over-confidence; just think of a stereotypical used car salesman. Sometimes it is because they don’t care – they are using all their personal resources just trying to get through the day.

We are human. We come to associate certain behaviors and interactions with people the more interactions we have with them. Some cause pleasure, some sorrow and some, concern.

The other day, a regular patron came in. This woman usually looks downtrodden. Her posture is slumped, she doesn’t make eye contact. When she comes to the desk, it is in an attitude of apology for intruding. Other days, she is grumpy and unpleasant.

Creative Librarian was at the desk when she came in. She walked right up to her, looking CL in the eye and smiling. She was very chatty and positive. “I’d like to share something with you,” she said. “Is that all right?”

Creative Librarian smiled back, happily surprised at her cheerfulness, and nodded. The woman read her the most positive quotes from the new book, The Three Hour Diet. Quotes about realizing your potential and achieving your dreams.

They agreed that it was important to keep this in mind and make progress toward your goals. They discussed the encouragement books can give. "Isn’t that super?” the woman said. “I just wanted to share that with you." – and she walked out, head up, beaming.

We don’t know what caused this change. Medication? Counseling? Divorce? New love? The book itself?

Whatever it was, we were glad to see it. Now when we see her coming, we won’t always feel that concern. We will have not our first of many sad impressions, but the last, most positive one.

Whatever the cause, we will know that there is hope, and that she has found it.

Comments

[Shelly]

I love stories like this. Thanks for sharing it. :)

[aleah marie]

This is a great story. I also work at a service desk in a public library. Daily I'm reminded of how much we assume about a person and their intentions based on their body language. This can be a difficult reaction to keep in check.

Your story reinforces how important it is to continually remain open to a person. We never know what underlying circumstance has created their mood for that particular day.

My daily mantra: Don't take it personally!

[Mo]

Hurrah, the FGL is back! Thanks, as always for this post. It's so easy to forget that we only see a little bit of each person who comes to the reference desk, and yet we make assumptions about their entire lives based on that.

[Clare Grant]

This post from Nee Naw, the blog of a London ambulance dispatcher, is similar: http://www.neenaw.co.uk/index.php/ambulances/10/a-good-day/